Predict a Cricket Headline for 2017

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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2017

Postby Alviro Patterson » Sun Feb 26, 2017 2:43 am

Arsenal FC midfielder Jeff Reine-Adelaide announces he is to retire from football and take up cricket, with a view of playing for the Adelaide Strikers in the Big Bash.
"Stats are there to be broken" Dominic Cork
"They took all our players away, banned our captain and we still came away with a ten-wicket victory" Jason Gillespie
"You won't get anywhere slouching about half out of bed" Geoffrey Boycott


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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2017

Postby Alviro Patterson » Thu Mar 02, 2017 1:23 am

In an attempt to win promotion with a -48pt handicap, Ian Botham motivates Durham cricketers by making them watch the entire 1981 Headingley Ashes test match.
"Stats are there to be broken" Dominic Cork
"They took all our players away, banned our captain and we still came away with a ten-wicket victory" Jason Gillespie
"You won't get anywhere slouching about half out of bed" Geoffrey Boycott


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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2017

Postby bigfluffylemon » Wed Mar 08, 2017 7:28 am

India announce Shane Watson as new DRS coach.
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2017

Postby Durhamfootman » Wed Mar 08, 2017 10:28 pm

MCC announce that batsmen will not be given out bowled, if their bat is grounded when the bails start to flash
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2017

Postby Durhamfootman » Wed Mar 08, 2017 10:31 pm

MCC announce that 5 penalty runs will be awarded to the batting side if a bowler steps on the cracks in the pavement when entering the ground
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2017

Postby Aidan11 » Wed Mar 08, 2017 10:33 pm

MCC ratify ECBs request to deduct more points from Durham just for the hell of it.
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2017

Postby Durhamfootman » Wed Mar 08, 2017 10:33 pm

a further 5 penalty runs will be awarded if a fielding player is caught wearing a loud shirt during the hours of darkness in a day/night test match
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2017

Postby Durhamfootman » Wed Mar 08, 2017 10:34 pm

(with thanks to 'Not the Nine O'clock News)
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2017

Postby Durhamfootman » Wed Mar 08, 2017 10:35 pm

'Looking at the umpire in a funny way' will be punished with a red card for 20 minutes
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2017

Postby Durhamfootman » Wed Mar 08, 2017 10:37 pm

A bowler will be removed from the attack for 20 overs if cited for loitering with intent to begin his run up
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GarlicJam

Postby GarlicJam » Wed Mar 08, 2017 11:11 pm

Durhamfootman wrote:'Looking at the umpire in a funny way' will be punished with a red card for 20 minutes

The ICC/MCC have to rethink this rule when, on the first game after its implementation, the entire fielding team is sent off for 20 minutes in the second over of play.

Then the batsmen gave the umps quizzical looks.....
Maybe
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2017

Postby from_the_stands » Thu Mar 09, 2017 9:37 am

Following the announcement that Mitch Marsh had been ruled out of the remainder of the India series with a shoulder injury, it was later revealed that the injury occurred when Marsh was firmly tapped on the shoulder by Darren Lehmann, the selectors, all other members of the Oz touring squad, and basically anyone within arm's reach.
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2017

Postby rich1uk » Thu Mar 09, 2017 12:01 pm

CA hire Harry Hill to assist with DRS decisions
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2017

Postby Aidan11 » Fri Mar 17, 2017 8:07 am

Durham CCC refused request for referendum to become independent from the ECB.
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2017

Postby Durhamfootman » Fri Mar 17, 2017 2:16 pm

Nicola Sturgeon calls it a sporting outrage
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