Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

Postby Alviro Patterson » Tue Mar 20, 2018 7:51 am

ECB reveal that Peter Moores used the services of Cambridge Analytica for the failed 2015 Cricket World Cup campaign.
In Phil Parkinson we trust
"You won't get anywhere slouching about half out of bed"
"They took all our players away, banned our captain and we still came away with a ten-wicket victory"

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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

Postby Arthur Crabtree » Tue Mar 20, 2018 9:17 am

Excellent!
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

Postby bigfluffylemon » Wed Mar 21, 2018 8:22 am

Andrew Strauss denies any Russian involvement in his appointment as director of England cricket.
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

Postby Arthur Crabtree » Wed Mar 21, 2018 10:09 am

Paul Downton awarded Hero of Russian Federation gold star in moving ceremony in Red Square.
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

Postby GarlicJam » Sat Mar 24, 2018 9:03 pm

Andrew Strauss gives thanks to the Cricketing Gods as Australia's cheating takes the attention away from England's incompetence.
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

Postby Durhamfootman » Sat Mar 24, 2018 10:56 pm

Andrew Strauss vows to end the North -v- South fixtures with immediate effect, after the North have the temerity to beat the South
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

Postby Arthur Crabtree » Sun Mar 25, 2018 10:54 am

South Africa appoint a firm of solicitors to walk out on the morning of the crucial fourth Test in Jo'burg and toss the coin with Australian captain Tim Paine.
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

Postby Arthur Crabtree » Sun Mar 25, 2018 1:18 pm

In a welcome gesture of rapprochement in the cricket war between South Africa and Australia, Proteas skipper Faf du Plessis offers to show shamed Aussie counterpart Steve Smith how to tamper with the ball without being detected.
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

Postby Durhamfootman » Sun Mar 25, 2018 6:48 pm

Shamed Steve Smith left to rue forgetting to pretend that the tape was only used to remove stray pieces of grass from the ball.
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

Postby Durhamfootman » Sun Mar 25, 2018 6:49 pm

Michael Atherton seen coming out of Wilko with a pot, a kettle, and tin of black paint
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

Postby GarlicJam » Sun Mar 25, 2018 9:14 pm

Arthur Crabtree wrote:In a welcome gesture of rapprochement in the cricket war between South Africa and Australia, Proteas skipper Faf du Plessis offers to show shamed Aussie counterpart Steve Smith how to tamper with the ball without being detected.

The real value in the lesson was "When caught, deny, deny, deny.".
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

Postby Slipstream » Tue Mar 27, 2018 3:10 pm

David Saker, after being sacked by CA, has accepted the role of England's bowling coach once again. Farbrace is the new England coach with Silverwood as the assistant coach. Bayliss embarrassed by England's batting and Australia's ball tampering has resigned.
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

Postby from_the_stands » Tue Mar 27, 2018 3:22 pm

Following the ball tampering scandal, Shanky tearfully tears down the poster of Steve Smith from his wall, and adds it to the pile of previously torn down posters of MSD and KP. To make himself feel better, he forgets about cricket and resubscribes to one of his favourite Russian websites. Within 24 hours, Shanky is rushed to hospital suffering severe dehydration.
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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

Postby mikesiva » Tue Mar 27, 2018 6:41 pm

:lmaoagain
Nobody has a stance quite like the mighty Shivnarine....

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Re: Predict a Cricket Headline for 2018

Postby bigfluffylemon » Wed Mar 28, 2018 3:24 am

South Africa win fourth test against Australia. No one notices.
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